In this update I’d like to back track to the start of 2019 and talk about some of the things I was involved in.
January I continued selling things on Gumtree, some of Kat’s but mostly Mum’s things. I also bought Mum’s car which was a necessity to get to visit her at Regis. When Kat or Jen visited I was then able to lend them the car to help them get about too.
Suzie, Mum’s dog was settling into her new home with a church family with two children. I met them at a park once. Suzie was delighted to see me but raced off to play with the children. She knew who her new alliance was too.
At church I met Nigel, who later came for a chat to help me with my business ideas. I must admit I hadn’t been feeling too enthusiastic about the business; I think because it is taking so long to get to market. Nigel is in marketing and had a great idea on how to maybe pass on the business so I didn’t need to be too involved. Another church friend, Matt, gave me more input. Both these accomplished business men enthused me once again. Both promised to help me once the time came to spread the word.
Grace, who was now working on the app, was also distracted with family matters, so between us we were lagging. It seems this business idea has been struggling to get the attention it needed. 
Eventually both Grace and I had some time to get serious again. There were several exchanges of ideas, what would work and what changes needed to be made. God willing, very soon, we will see the trial of our app, offering discounted coffee. I am looking for 10 volunteers who will become members to run this trial. Any offers?
February My friend Sally, also from church, had her 50th birthday and house warming early February. Sally had been trying to sell her house in the UK for months so that she could purchase a family home here. After much searching, she found a lovely two story home with a swimming pool overlooking a large park. Friends from various walks of life came to celebrate, including Nezka, my nephew’s wife, whose son knows Sally’s children from the North Beach Primary School.
This year I joined a group from MeetUp, an online site that helps likeminded people get together. I joined a group called ‘Women Professionals Perth’ and went to their first gathering in February. I saw it as a great way to make new connections for our business. Their first venue was in Leederville and easily accessed from the train. By parking at Stirling Station and taking the train, there was no need to bother with parking restrictions. I enjoyed meeting these young professional women, although I did feel like the oldie amongst them. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to attend again till 29th of June and then it was only myself and the organiser, as it was a cold, wet wintery day. I didn’t mind as it was a great opportunity to get to know each other better over a hot coffee.
February 17th saw the start of our two morning church services. I decided that 8:30am was far too early for someone who had a heap of activities to do in the morning. During the winter months when it’s not pouring with rain, I wait for the first rays of light to illuminate my path so that I don’t trip over things or run through the puddles as I jog along the bush paths. Then back for my exercise routine, a cold shower and breaky before taking the bread down to church by 9:45. I then have time to chat to the early service attendants or take my turn helping the baristas serve coffees before the 10:30 service begins. It was said, people in the late service came late so they could sleep in…. I wish! My sleep in is usually 6am!
My neighbour Ann went for a three week holiday mid-February, which meant I had her car if I needed it when Kat visited for a week. I actually preferred taking public transport, especially during the off peak or weekends, as I have free travel thanks to the WA Seniors Card. During Kat’s visit, late February, I took the train south to Kelmscott where I caught up with Jean Smith, a friend from my Armadale days in the 80’s. Carla, her daughter, had stayed with me on a visit to Sydney in 2012. They now live in Spain where Jean originally went as a missionary, but later stayed on to help with the local churches. 
She and Carla are soon to relocate to Cairns in QLD to live. It was lovely to see Jean after so long. Later in March I also caught up with a friend from my BC days (Before Christ). I met Robyn in the 80’s at an alternative festival in the south. Later, I was invited back to their farm in Hyden. Robyn and I took a trip to the Philippines to visit the ‘Fake’, sorry, faith healers before she returned home and I continued touring Asia.
Also in February I attended a memorial service for Teresa at the Pinnaroo Cemetery grounds. She had been receiving treatment for cancer for many years, this service was a year after her latest fight that finally took its toll. There was quite a gathering of friends and family, many of whom spoke on how Teresa had touched their lives. Teresa had been one of our Bible study friends.
March was a busy month in the garden. I planted lots of vegies, which soon began to pop up. Peas, tomatoes, broad beans, spinach and carrots. I attended a workshop put on by our local council ‘Planning our garden for all seasons’. Then in April another council information day on ‘Pruning native trees’. I must admit I thought it was on pruning in general. In May I went with friends from church to an open home and garden put on by the guy who had spoken at the council workshops. He showed us sustainable living he had set up for his family. Because I had been to two previous talks, I knew much of what he was talking about and once again acquired a large bag of soil improver for answering the questions correctly. On another occasion I picked up some hardy native ground covers I ordered from our proactive council, who once a year, gives plants away. Another workshop I attended was for Carers; this one gave information on Advanced Care Plans. I have been trying to work on mine since putting Mum’s into place at Regis. February turned out to be a very informative month. Even our Bible study group put on a morning tea for the missionaries we support in Mozambique. They were home on furlough to have their fourth baby. It was interesting to hear of the stories and challenges they had and were facing in the remote areas they lived in. Then the Social Action group of which I am a part, held two meetings to plan fund raising strategies for the organisations we support.
I also started a series of physio treatments for my neck and shoulders. I have struggled with painful knotted shoulders and neck for years due to poor posture while leaning over cots to settle babies. I must admit any treatment I receive really doesn’t last long and the problem quickly reoccurs or is trigged by one thing or another, like lifting heavy things at Mum’s. I’m sure it has something to do with something I’m NOT doing or doing incorrectly. I do exercises to strengthen this area but nothing seems to help!
In April, I visited Mum’s old place in Kitchener Street. I was shown all the changes they had and were making and mentioned how I would miss Mum’s roses. The new owner suggested I dig them out if I wanted them. I could also take the archway which the rambling rose grew over. I was delighted. I had wanted to move them to my place when we had put the house up for sale but thought it was not appropriate. Now that I had permission, I asked a friend from church to give me a hand.
I already had Mum’s roses which were in pots so now I prepared spots in the garden for the remaining four roses. Two roses from Mum’s front garden and two from around the arch. I knew exactly where I wanted them: under the front window where the lavender kept dying.
First I took the blood red rose, which has an amazing scent. This would make room for me to remove the arch and then the rambling rose. I had to cut them all back quite severely, especially the rambling rose, which was well over two meters high and four wide. Roses are very tough and by June it was producing beautiful roses in its new spot over the arch in my garden. It took three of us to dig out the rose and the arch, which we transported in the back of Jan’s van, which we had borrowed for the day. Grahame, who has vertigo, was helping me, along with his grandson. I kept insisting that Grahame not go up my little rickety path, but of course men often do not listen to younger women and he fell into my lovely smoky cushion bush, which of course he flattened. Praise God he didn’t injure himself.
For all the effort it required to dig them out, I was delighted with the results. All but two survived. I know why they didn’t, as I had run out of the specific rose compost mix and instead put in alpaca poo, which had been sitting in a bin. Sadly it hadn’t broken down enough and went mouldy around the rose roots. The sad thing was, it was my two favourite roses which had amazing scent and colour. I’m not sure if I will replace them, as I still have two in pots. One pot I tried to salvage because it is one of three Chinese dragon pots, 65cm high. Regrettably the crack just became larger, till part of the rim and side fell off and although I’ve scoured the internet, I haven’t been able to find a replacement.
The street trees outside my place are olives. This is the second year I have collected the olive crop to pickle. This year I tried a new method I heard was used on the Greek islands. Here they used sea water instead of salt for the washing process. For a week I took my olives in a small bucket and washed them in the surf before bottling them. After three weeks, they were ready to eat. Very yummy. I also tried my hand at making Kimchi. I haven’t liked Kimchi in the past as it’s usually has too much chilli. The recipe I found used fish sauce, which interested me. I changed the ingredients slightly, combining two recipes so I could add lime juice giving it a Thai flavour. I then waited 28 days, allowing it to ferment and make the right bacteria for good gut health. It actually turned out very tasty.
One of the Social Action Group’s fund raising activities we organised was a special Passover Dinner, led by a Messianic Jew. It was an amazing learning experience. Hidden within this traditional Jewish meal and its symbols is the message of the coming and redemptive sacrifice of Christ Jesus their Messiah.
The up-and-coming Australia elections saw many Christians called to a 21 days of prayer and fasting from the 28th of April. It was a great spiritual gathering and unification of the saints across the different denominations seeking the Lord for His intervention in appointing a leader to lead this nation in Righteousness. And what a result we saw. Barriers were broken down as Christians united in prayer. God moved in an amazing way and our born- again leader was re-elected. We continue in prayer for our country to grant freedom of speech and religion.
May the first was Mum’s birthday. Apart from Kat’s visits and an occasional visit from friends popping in to see Mum, I visited every day from around 2 – 4:30 pm. It wasn’t always easy but I enjoyed being with Mum, even if it was just to lie beside her as she rested on her bed.
It was also in May that I was given a contact for someone who might help me start an interdenominational Hymn and Gospel sing along at Regis. I had been trying to find people to join with me since Mum moved to Regis in October, but it hadn’t eventuated. When I phoned the number given to me, I saw it popped up as someone I knew, Patrick Tobin. I was pleasantly surprised it was a guy who had taken me to church many years ago to attend Gate Way Christian Church in the city. Pat was delighted to hear from me and very willing to join me. We met to discuss a time and day before I confirmed with Regis. May 26th we were granted permission to commence. It was truly a God-given opportunity. Marilyn and I from church, Pat on his guitar, Christine who had given me Pat’s number and her Mum and mine with six residents who came to join us. Even those in the coffee lounge said they enjoyed the singing. Little did we know this would be the last time we would meet until July 14th as Regis went into lockdown due to an influenza outbreak.
In the evening of Saturday the 4th of May I walked down to the local supermarket. I started filling a bag with lettuce leaves from their scraps bin, when a cheerful voice asks me “do you have guineapigs?” “No” I answered “earthworms”. “Oh can I have some of the liquid for my bonsai’s?” “Yes sure, if we can barter, as I’ve been inquiring where I can learn how to Bonsai?” I said. We introduced ourselves, exchanging phone number and address before we left the store. We got to know a bit more about each other as we walked back to my place. Karen asked what I did with myself during the week. I told her I was quite involved with things at church and visiting Mum every afternoon. I found out she had been a Christian when she was younger but due to a terrible event, no longer attended church. She had wanted to go at Easter and joined a friend who went to one in Scarborough but it was full of old people and had no life. I suggested she join me the following day at North Beach. When we got to my place, I gave her some of the bread I had collected from the bakery and showed her Mum’s paintings, as she said she had just started teaching herself water colours. The photos she had taken of her work showed real talent. She then headed home with a promise she would meet me at 10 am for church.
I met her at the door, where she was looking a bit apprehensive, “too many people and too noisy”, she said. I showed her around, introduced her to some friends then took her into the quieter auditorium. I wasn’t sure how she took the music but when she started sketching during the service I got the impression she wasn’t really interested. We had a guest speaker that day talking on his family’s call to Peru as May is our mission’s month. It was very interesting but maybe not what she expected. She later told me she was more into ancient philosophies and that she didn’t feel this was for her. But she would come to my place on Tuesday to collect the worm castings.
We have remained friends, going on long walks, collecting the bread on Saturdays when I haven’t had the car. One very rainy day when Jen was here in July, I was wanting to get out of the house and called her asking if she wanted a bit of an adventure. Karen had a gym session that morning in Cottesloe and as I’d already been jogging and completed my exercises, I enjoyed a coffee instead. While I waited for her, I watched the ocean churn through rain-lashed windows. We were going to train it from there but because of all the rain we drove to our destination, stopping on route to pick up the leftovers of mum’s vitamins from the Fremantle Pharmacy. Then for lunch at the Copper Chimney, where I’d come with family in June. It was a lovely lunch, followed by a long chat to one of the owners who is a Christian.
Kat was back for three weeks from the 15th of May to 6th of June. I dropped the car around at Jan’s in Karrinyup before she arrived. Later this same month, Jan and Ant invited me around for their house-warming and wedding anniversary celebrations. It was a formal dress-up occasion, which stumped me a bit as I don’t have any fancy dress clothes. I decided I’d wear the dress I had worn to Tricia’s wedding (1974). I was pleasantly surprised I could still fit into it.
Mid-May I visited the dental surgeon to ask him what was the best thing to do in regards to a tooth that was causing my jaw to decay. I explained I was hoping to go to Phuket for an implant, as friends knew someone there who had done an excellent job. My dentist was horrified and promised to help me get it all done here with the help of my health fund and a special reduced fee from himself. I then found out he was a Christian. I had a lovely time chatting with him and witnessing to his assistant.
May, being our church mission’s month, we have different speakers every week ending with a weekend of speakers and a dinner on the last Saturday evening. It was quite an event, offering foods with a South American twist.
On the first of June, Grace and her daughters came for a visit. We don’t often have time to catch up as Grace lives over an hour away by car. I have known Grace since early Sydney days and have been made part of her family, becoming like an aunty to her three children. We took a drive to Hillarys for an ice cream and a sit in the sun.
This time that Kat was in town, her boyfriend, Duncan, was with her. He is from Cairns QLD and is also a FIFO, working as a skipper on the boats. Kat brought Duncan over to introduce him to Mum and to spend time with her. They also took this opportunity for a short trip down south to show Duncan around. On Wednesday 5th June, just before Kat left for work, she dropped off the car and introduced me to Duncan too.
I have been very blessed to enjoy Yum Cha/Dim Sum several times already this year. Firstly in April with a Chinese friend, Yee Moi, from church, then by Kat on 30th May for an early Birthday Lunch, and a late Birthday lunch with Jen and Dave when they came in July. It’s one of my favourite meals and best to be enjoyed with family or more than two people.
Besides my birthday being in June, there were other events that marked this month. My top loader washing machine’s door hinge broke. I thought of buying a new machine then realised it would still work if I dismantled it completely and just rested it in place. Problem solved and money saved! Why get a new machine when the workings of the old one were fine?
The day of my birthday a friend from church invited me and a few friends to lunch. I felt very spoilt. Three days later, Mum had passed away, Jen and Kat returned and the whirlwind of events began.
A week after Mum’s passing, my dear friend Yvonne Woods, a missionary working as nurse educator in White River South Africa was home on furlough. The Lord knows how to encourage. It was good to catch up with her after the events of the previous week. She and I collected Mum’s ashes and drove around fulfilling some of her errands. She returned another day for lunch before I picked up Jen and Dave coming in from QLD for the trip they had planned previously to introduce Dave to Mum. This time they decided to have a holiday, catch up with Dave’s friends south of Perth and spend a night at Rottnest as Dave was determined to see the Quokkas. Then on Sunday 7th July Jen had organised a family get-together to discuss what everyone wanted to do with Mum’s ashes. 
Kat couldn’t come but said whatever was decided, she wanted to know the day and time so she could spend it in contemplation. It was disappointing that Tricia and Trevor didn’t want to join us. She said she felt too uncomfortable. After discussing it with her family we decided it was best to give Mum’s ashes to Noel, Tricia’s eldest son who would then take them to Tricia with a request to let us all know what she had decided to do. The rest of us had suggested it would be nice to sprinkle the ashes at Mettems Pool where Mum enjoyed so many days swimming and walking her dogs. These wishes unfortunately were not carried out, as Tricia decided to do her own thing without any of the family, which I know greatly upset her own family as well as Kat and Jen. I think it will only be miracle from the Lord to reconcile the rift between us now. Praise the Lord I believe in miracle.
I had inquired with the council about having a memorial plaque placed on a chair of the wall near Mettams Pool but was informed that only local celebrities were allowed plaques. How disappointing! In the meantime, Kat, Jen and I worked on the wording for a plaque which could be placed in a spot reserved by Mum above Dad’s at Karrakatta Garden of Remembrance. We thought this was a very appropriate place for her plaque as, although they were separated, they were never divorced and Mum continued to love him despite his downfalls.
July 1-9th Jen and Dave were over. The week they left was the start of the school holidays, which meant no Bible study or Tuesday helping make coffees for the teachers at the primary school. Instead I volunteered to serve coffee at King’s Club, which is the church outreach programme for children and families. By the end of the week I had caught a bug and was laid up all Sunday with a migraine and chest infection, which moved to my sinuses and kept me just about house-bound for two weeks. This time at home gave me time to do household things, including this blog. It also started me thinking about [of] what I might do now that I had extra time on my hands.
I’ve had a few moments of sadness since Mum’s passing, which is understandable. I’ve noticed it is often over regrets of some sort or another. I’m not going to entertain these thoughts, as I know I did all that I could to help mum through this time of Dementia Care. Now that this chapter of my life has come to a close, I’m really excited about what future the Lord will bring.
I have some exciting news to bring you in the next blog. I’m calling this next chapter of my life ‘Life Beyond Care’ or ‘Beyond Care’ for short.
Thanks everyone for your prayers and lovely words of encouragement. At the moment we are tidying up all the paperwork etc. I am trying to be patient as I excitingly await upon the Lord for His leading and direction for this new chapter of my life.
Photos: 1. Sunset over North Beach 2. Business logo 3. North Beach 4. Jean and me 5. Mum’s rose over arch in my garden 6. Me and new friend Karen 7. Masala Dosa 8. Me all dressed up 9. Missions dinner evening 10. Grace, her daughters and me 11. Yum Cha with Yee Moi and friends 12. Dad and Mum 13. Yum Cha with Jen and Dave
Prayer & Praise Points:
Praise the Lord for His ongoing peace, strength and leading. What a comfort and reassurance knowing He is with me as I face the future and the adventures that lies ahead.
Please continue to pray for the salvation of my three sisters, Tricia, Jen and Kat and especially for reconciliation and forgiveness between Tricia and the rest of us.
Thank you for your prayers for the business, Senior’s Benefits and Rewards. It is proceeding and God willing will be trialled this August. Please continue to pray for its success.
Thank you to all my supportive friends and prayer partners; it’s such an encouragement to know you are all standing with me.